one of those days

I am not sure...
yes, it's been such a long time, i have just forgotten how to trust wat my heart says.
it is so difficult to think or imagine or hope. thats such a terrible thing to say, have i lost all my hopes?

wat is killing me is the conflict, and i have those in large amounts all the time...

never having thought something can be wanted or desired, because it was too gud to be true, and suddenly being made to stand under a floodlit stage and expected to respond...
i am completely blinded....

perhaps by my own inability to respond, or by my lack of enthusiam, may be i hv bcme boring...???

may be i have grown up..???
may be i have lost dat tuch??????????????


oh !! its so frustrating not to knw which way to go...!
i have always followed my heart but i am scared, wat if i am wrong.. i dont wana mark one mre hit for the board.

well my experience is nt worth mentioning, i hv a 1 and half experience wid love, n i have foolishly refused to be in love wid anyone for years now fearing myself....

scared that i may hurt people...
as if the criticism dat i received had completely broken my faith in being a gud person, n a person who cud make pple happy.. yes thats it, i think i have stopped believing tht i cn make pple happy!!!!!!!!

may be dats wat it is.. may dats y i am so scared...

i wish i cud say .... dat i like u,
or dat i really wud like it if we got together ..
it wud a dream like experience fr me.. but i am afraid to say the words..
fearing that this itself is a dream taht may break if i speak out....


help me!