suddenly oneday

the subject line reads as if this mail is more like a poem or at least a short story, well, i guess i do belive letters are in their own league a genre of literature. did you know that at one point of time, novels were written in the form of letters to and from various characters? actually, the earliest form of writing for leisure as in the form of novels was in the form of collection of letters, most often fictitious ofcourse.anyway that was a bit of my english hons back ground taking over. honestly, i have this feeling most often i tend to write only abt vry personal things, really of vry lil importance in the realm of intellectual reading, so, i guess my letters or mails shall never really find place in a collection of letters, ehh?kidding!!
one of my frnds on the net is Raghu, he is frm hyderabad, he and i have exchanged letters, handwritten ones, i mean. and it was a surprise and a pleasure to exchange thoughts with him. you see apart from popla i dont think anyone till date has bothered to write back, again let me be very specific, i probably mean you, because technically over the past few years it has been only u who i hve written to.anyway, Raghu belives, that he is not made out to write abt mundane things, things which happen in our day to day life, but letters acco to him should contain such thoughts which cannot be always verbalized and some grains of thoughts which can be retained for the future times to think and savour.i did build up a habit of sorts (if three letters can form a habit?) of writing like that, but honestly, it actually takes a lot of effort to write that way.
Rajdeep says it is not one fine day that a writer starts writing beutiful and meaningful things. he said to me just the other day, that priyanka the day u started writing, do u think u composed the best poem or the best writing, it has taken u time and with every line u have written u have gotten better at it, it is smething that u urself cn feel happening as u read ur series of writings, u have bcome better at understanding ur own emotions and thoughts and finding the correct and most imptly appropriate word to express it.Rajdeep is vry good at talking i smetimes feel listening to him as if he reading from a pre-written script, he is so well organised in what he wants to say and right from the logical flow of his thoughts and the choice of his words he is quite the orator. yes, i talk incessently but there is an art of speech which smehw he happens to knw or has developed, i dont knw which?anyway, having given this concept of developing better writng skills, i started to read my older writings, and i realised he was right. after all these years, i do feel that my poems or for that matter writing cn be read and understood by others. the immaturity of my writing was reflected in my fear that my poems were much too personal for pple to understand, but nw i realise that as time has gone by my choice of words have brought the thoughts away from personal closure to a public openness.i guess i ought to explain what got us talking abt this, i was wondering hw cme pple who write these amazing lyrics which u hear and almost feel that had u but thought this was exactly smething u wud hve written but u didn't write, to this Rajdeep said that it has taken these men and women years to come to such point where when ever they write such words take form, and ofcourse consatnt polishing is part of the artistic process, before i did not change anything i wrote trying to keep the sponataneity of it intact but there is much more beyond the spontaneous overflow of emotions, as wordsworth said, he himself changed and chopped his creations. that is truly the creative process.i also belive that most of our thoughts and especially a lot of wat i feel is extremely intangible and to put them into words is a very difficult concept, to begin with one must understand oneself in order to do so, apart from that i feel one needs to accept oneself and look at oneself, the real self in our inner mirror and accept that face and then only can someone write without fear, i belive part of this is also inborn, this truly ingenious thought ought to win me a noble prize, ehhh?
no, i guess i have completely rattled ur brains, or may be no, i wonder if any of my words leave a lasting impression on people's mind? a question which should not come to me, if i am to bcme a true artist, i must ignore all those why's only to write as much as possible...
so that some day when i am no longer mingling my life's breathe in these lonely environs someone somewhere may remember the wafting fragrance of some unknown flower reminds him of someone he knew who said something that makes sense now, yet, the name remains forgotten... or may be a smile streaks the corners of the curve to remember conversations under cobwebbed memories.
remember me, world, for i always fell in love with YOU over and over again!!